Back for another day of Secksieness? They are happy you came by, they are depressed because the Mitt and the republicans lost the election XD
They could use the pick me up:
And also, I don’t think Starla’s plan to find a rich old bachelor worked out very well. She’s involved with one of my simself kids, and that isn’t much of nothing. Really not a lot of options for them in Twinbrook I suppose.
“Well what do you know. There’s a missing cat poster on the store door! I never noticed that before. And it looks like a real cat too! I wonder if that was from the Pets update or if it’s been here the whole time. I wonder what other little details are around that I haven’t noticed before…”
“Really? But I jus’ gawt outta the hospital four minutes ago. I’m still all battered and canyon-ized down there.”
“What better time to start, my love :D”
“This is mah Sunday attire.”
“Tater, put that back, we don’t need to bring in any stray-oh, that’s my son, nevermind, then *continues to other stuff*”
The newborn baby spent the night in the front yard apparently, just like virtually all Secksie children, to ensure their connection to their natural environment.
They all went to the pool first.
“BRB, gonna go throw up sum’ guts in the bathroom, guys.”
“It’s cool, this pool makes me look like I don’t HAVE any guts… or legs…”
“Um… actually, yeah I DO mind! My wife is right here, dude! Seriously?!”
“I suppose so, even though you cheat because you are made out of water. Whatever strokes your ego I suppose, Bear.”
“Lalala, ignore me floatin’ through, apparently flyin’ through empty space, lalala”
At least she’s swimming in the correct tattoos.
“Ok-WAIT, NO OPAL NOT YET! Dammit Taylor! Don’t swim over my wife right this second! COME BACK DOWN OPAL! NOOOO!”
“And if you say a damn thing about me here enjoying the flowers, I will strangle you in your sleep. Also, say a damn thing about my Freddie Mercury get up and I will, also, strangle you in your sleep.”
You wore the jacket first. You asked for it, Sinbad.
Sinbad. As a coward.
“Jesus Christ what is wrong with you?! Haven’t you heard of what just happened in Chernobyl?! Everyone’s gonna die now! Them Russian’s being crazy!”
Maybe it was a phase he went through as a kid.
“Something just ain’t right here… this feels backwards, Goodwin.”
Apparently he went through a phase too?
I Annie Lennox’d Lucy.
“Sweet dreams are made of this~”
Then she proceeded to stay in the graveyard all night until the sun came up. Sounds like Lucy.
“We are just waiting for that baby to drop now, aren’t we?”
“That’s right, Taylor.”
“I don’t know if that’s Lauper, babe. I think that’s just that Jenni hooker kid.”
Hee hee… she bop. Damn, that was my jam when I was, I don’t know, four.
And they say kids these days don’t know the lyrics to the songs they sing today…
“Well, it’s cool, I’d prefer something that doesn’t make me feel weird every time I stand over an air conditioning vent.”
“I think so! Being rebellious to the point where you are ‘in’ with the system is rebellious! It’s rebelception! YEAH!”
Maybe Taylor shouldn’t be allowed to work in fashion.
“No, Bear, come back! The baby, UGH, I’M DEAD AND can’t really feel anything anyway…”
“I can’t help the woman! She went into the hospital, and the hospital is in my way! Help!”
I wonder how he doesn’t starve to death yet.
“It’s ok, I was just catching up on my 50 Shades reading anyway. Damn, I wish I had a red room too… too bad it would just cause me to route fail as well…”
Following whatever theme I have for Bear, his and Opal’s new baby is named Eagle.
This baby is so fucking patriotic you can smell the election.
“My question to yew is who da hell let’em back in the house? He’s stinkin’ up the kitchen! I thought yew said yew were gonna git it house broken!”
Actually, no, that was my fault because I forgot to add a door. Oops.
That’s why there isn’t a lot of focus on her the next couple of days.
Ok, so this next part may need explaining? Probably not but I will anyway. Ok, so Opal is working on sculpture skill, and of course that comes with opportunities like “Make Juan a sculpture because he’s lazy and too busy not wearing pants”. Of course, a normal person would have taken the sculpture, gotten in a taxi, and drove to Juan’s house. Of course Opal isn’t like most fleshbag sims though.
She decided to walk across the street to Lady and Nascar’s house, walk up to the second story of their house, and float out of the second floor bathroom window…
“Tal? I really can’t take a call right now, I’m busy trying to convince my senile brother that the babies in the house don’t come from a cabbage patch… what do you mean “my wife is flying”?! Flying on what?! What the hell did you give her, Tal?!”
“This is your pilot speaking, thank you for choosing Opal Airlines, we will reach our destination within two hours. At the moment we are going over the North Twinbrook River, if you look out to your left you can see it just below us flowing towards Bridgeport…”
“Oh Eagle, I have some bad news son. Your mother… she… *sniff*, was involved in a crash over the river, and well, oh… she’s dead, son.”
“Oh ok that’s good, will she be back in time for supper tonight, daddy?”
“Well of course, it’s her turn to cook tonight.”
“Oh shit, bitch gon’ get stabbed! (I, Tori, the daughter of Kip and Lady, will be on my way, now… or eventually…)”
“Lucy, stop him, he’s about to beat up a child again D:”
“No, Sinbad! Stop, sweet dreams are NOT made of this!”
“I, Tori, the child of Kip and Lady, do not want this D:”
“OMG GO AWAY TORI”
“Gonna ignore you, gonna walk around and keep pretending you aren’t really here…”
“UGH, THIS DOESN’T GET ANY EASIER”
“Daddy, I’m in labor. Ain’t no way in hell, I’m ridin’ a horse to the hospital.”
“Sigh, fine. Get in the truck bed though, ain’t no way yew gettin’ ur crotch juice on my leather seatin.”
“She’s named after a country song about a teenage hooker :D”
Not… really? Sure whatever.
“Naw, that’s just another baby brought in from the cabbage patch. I think Bear ‘n Opal claim it though, what are you doing with it here?”
“Have you ever touched your OWN baby, Dolly?”
“Dammit son, your mother is such a prima donna.”
“Alrighty guys, I just put the little girl up for a nap. I think she’s a really cute little baby from the patch. I think I’ll call her Hildegard.”
“DAMMIT TATER, THEY AREN’T GARDEN BABIES”