Before we begin, I would just like to say a few words about my game. You see, ever since I started my rainbowcy, I haven’t had a single crash on that town since it started. Ok, maybe one or two I don’t even remember, if I pushed my computer too hard (which isn’t really a lot to push), but virtually crashless anyway.
The timeline of this chapter by itself has seen eight crashes. And counting. Last chapter saw only two or so, but this is ridiculous now. I can’t figure out what the hell is going on, and the events of this chapter have been repeated so many times I just want to pull out my own teeth or something less painful than this repetition. I’m moving along. Just at a very short pace.
So anyway, on to the chapter.
By the way, I “fixed” the problem last chapter where the toddlers couldn’t be interacted with. All I have to do is restart the game every time it happens D| which doesn’t matter, it’s going to crash anyway. Thank god for the swings.
Someone is way too happy to see the death of the last maternal figure in the family…
“I’m getting off now :(”
Let’s see, some new simselves were added, oh, er, simself. This is Puddin, and she got stuck in Hetty’s old cat house on the outskirts of town. She would have had simself roomies, like Andy, or Mickey, or Sacha, or all the other simselves my game says it’s successfully “installed” for me, but is really shitting on all my hopes and wishes.
I’ve gotten mad stupid.
“Ok horse. I want to complete my LTW at some fricking point, and you have two race related wishes since your turning of age, so we have to try to at least put or differences behind us if we have any hopes for our goals.”
“Yeah fine, bring me a meaty offering and I will consider letting you ride me successfully, mortal human.”
“How about a carrot?”
“Fine. We can be friends now.”
“How about a carrot?”
“FUCK YOU KEN.”
Probably hell no.
“Yeah pops, that’s wut I figgur’d.”
Dolly’s fairing a little better over Bella’s death. Then again, she doesn’t have school to also focus her saddness on, seeing as Bella died on a friday night. At least she did something right for once and died on the weekend.
“YAY, a happy childhood memory fur me!”
No memories in my game, Dolly.
“Ok… YAY I’m naked!”
Yeah, really good thing she’s gone now…
“I am still distraught over the death of my love.”
You two bumped uglies only once Nascar, how could you even think you two were in love?!
“…Oh crap Tater, PLEASE tell me our little girl is going to pop out of this in a second…”
“She should… any second now… ANY SECOND NOW…”
“Haha, that’s damn funny right thur.”
Even if she knows she’s pretty and all that now that she’s snobbish. Proud trailer trash, yes.
“I’m so damn uncomfortable right now that I’m going to block the front door…”
“OW what the HELL man! I think you broke my skull!”
“You shall not creep on little children while I’m around, you freak!”
“AH DUDE GET YOUR HEAD OUT OF MY SKULL, I’VE LEARNED MY LESSON”
The pervert somehow got away from the porch crowd and got in the house (please get away from him, Lady) and Dolly had hardly finished her cake when a prom announcement came up, which I find to be jumping the gun a bit, game.
“So papa, can I go?! It sounds like so much fun from the five minutes I’ve been of age!”
“Hm… considerin’ that ur only 13ish or so… hell no.”
Um… for what?
“I’m a music fan!”
In a sweater?
“Well, I can’t wear a torn white tee to a gospel choir.”
Oh, I see.
“Hello? Oh Tal, I haven’t heard from YEW inna’ long time! Wut yew been up to, man? You had a kid? With a woman?! Oh gawd, please tell me she consented… she did?! And she MARRIED YOU *crash* She’s still LIVING WITH YOU?! A simself woman?! Lucky sonuvabitch. I mean, good for yew? Me? My lovelife? …I gotta go man, I’ll talk to you later.”
You will, eventually! I promise!
“But your horse has such a nice buttocks”
“PLEASE MAKE HIM GO AWAY”
Oh I would! I would adopt and love and rename you Flareon and recolor you and LOVE AND CUTENESS AND HAPPY RAINBOWS OF ADORABLE YOUR FACE
“NAWT IN MAH HOUSE YEW LIL LAPDOG”
And then half a second later Cletus reduced him to a limp rag and I cried myself to sleep that night.
GET THE FUCK OFF MY LOT
“But your youngest little girl! I can hear her! And I want to hold her and cuddle her”
RUN INTO AN ELECTRIC FENCE
“So papa! I know it’s still a lil early fur me to go to prom, but I really want to go! I know I’m 13, but I promise I’ll be safe, and stick with girlfriends, and avoid spiked drinks and will come in early that night! Won’t yew let me go?”
“Now that yew put it that way, sure.”
“Now that yew put it that way, sure.”
Rico: “LOL I’m still here”
“-and yew still don’t know anything about the datin’ scene, ‘n I ain’t gonna let my lil’ girl become some toy fur some 17 year old hop head wid’ a crotch rocket! I hate those motorcycles.”
“I just want to know why the little girl is crying”
OMG FALL IN A HOLE RICO but that is a good question. Why is Sugar crying?
Considering Dolly and Tater are fighting in the yard, and Nascar is asleep, with you being the only other person in the house, who else could it have been, Bear?!
“I don’t THINK so, Lynyrd! Ever hear of chivalry? Ladies first, you jackass.”
“But I’m the oldest, and I should get the first dibs! Back off, I called it!”
“GO SUCK ON THE COWPLANT, DIPTARD”
As I mentioned before, there have been all the crashes and stuff. And seeing how there were a lot of the crashes around the time of Ora Mae and Dolly’s birthday, I thought that Ora was causing the crashes, with her glitchy grow up sequences that effected the whole household and the long drawn out age up animations that went on way too long. So I killed her.
“Did it work? Did killing me make the crashes go away?”
Didn’t even faze them.
“Sigh… git ur hand off me.”
“Oh, um, I’nno, haha”
“Dammit, all my kids are white as hell! I swear that ho cheated on me, oh SOB”
“Um, Zac, Sheldon looks just like you in the face. Why are you questioning your parentage still?! Idiot…”
“Haha, sure, I’d love to!”
“Why not, I have nothing better to do that night!”
“I’d LOVE to! This is going to be so much fun-”
*MOTHER FUCKING CRASH*
DAMMIT GAME, STOP FIGHTING ME
“Hello Mrs. Sarah. I’ve had a burnin’ question I’ve been meanin’ to ask yew since I noticed yew lived here now. How’s it feel knowin’ ya have 3-5 kids, ‘n none of them live here with yew ‘r ur husband?”
I was curious, and looked around town for a bit trying to find all her kids, and only found two of them, both by her current husband, but instead of taking them with her when they got married, they are now living with Dan. Poor Dan. Forced to take care of Sarah’s babies by another man once again. I think all the stress has caused him to grow chick hair, because that’s a style I don’t even have converted, Dan ._.
“It’s ok! Because I’m looking for an orphanage as we speak! But I’m looking for a good orphanage, one where the care takers will take care of them and let them grow up knowing that there’s love in the world, in a city without thieves to tempt them into a bad life… or dragons…”
You’re playing Skyrim, aren’t you?
“It may be in a window off to the side or something…”
Here she is playing tag with the orc.
“I swear fur a split second she unshethed her sword…”
“Hey there papa! I gawt somethin’ to tell yew. Now, I know yew said I couldn’t go to the prom ‘cus I was too yung’n stuff, but I found a guy, and he’s real nice ‘n all, ‘n seein’ as I’ve talked to him at least four times by now, yew GOTTA let me go to the prom now, please?!”
“Sigh, did yew NAWT hear a word I said the
other day yesterday probably five concecutive minutes ago ’bout that damn prom?! Ur too young, too immature, and yew hardly know anyone from ur high school yet anyway! I’d rather set mahself on fire than hear any more business ’bout this and that’s THAT, Dolly!”
“Yeah ‘n I bet ur grammaw wouldn’t have a problem wid all dem lil hornytoads handsin’ all over ya either! They never caught that Rico kid, Dolly! They NEVER CAUGHT HIM!”
I don’t know, Tater might have a point there…
Oh, there you are, still hanging out with the orc ._. I should really save the game when you get back to the house before a crash sends you back here with her or something.
“Mmm, newspaper. Perfect source of fiber and political scandal.”
“I’m pissed off because yew won’t let me do mah fav’rite thing to do in this hawse. Ur like a damn cell guard ’round this place these days.”
What the hell are you talking about, Bear?
NO, LEAVE HER ALONE D:<
“FOR THE LOVE OF GOD DOLLY, BACK UP! BACK UP OH FUGGIN HELL”
Actually technically the last thing that happened in the game was Lynyrd eating paper, so Dolly doesn’t know how to drive. She will probably crash into the ice cream truck again next time, and probably one more time after that… but how will she fair at prom (if we get to it)?! How will the toddlers grow up (if we get to it)?! Will Lady be corrupted by the orc and all that is Dovahkiin or will she finally come home (if we get to it)?!
Usually I’d play a little bit of sims after I post a chapter or so, kind of a after post celebration play. But… because of all the crashes, I just don’t feel it tonight.
It’s so discouraging.
I’m going to go look up videos of cats now.