Why Bella is an Embarrassment

It’s just been that kind of weekend for updates, hasn’t it?  Just an uneventful week otherwise anyway.

“So there I was, alone in the house, the ghosts closing in on me, calling my name and beckoning me with icy fingers…”

“Oh noes!  Then wut did’ya do?!”

“I squeezed on my little Tater doll I made out of a clip of your hair and hid under the blankets until morning.  I may or may not have also wet myself.”

“…”

So last time Tater was left at the salon, considering hot married chicks and being forced to listen to Ethan’s tales of horror and forced feelings.  When all of a sudden:

“Welp, I’ve taught the dawg how to hunt ‘n stuff, and the horse is trained.  I guess my use fur this world is ovur.”

WAIT, something more important is happening, Dale…

“Hello my baby, hello my honey, hello my rag time GAL *breaks out into the Loony Tunes frog dance*”

Best way to celebrate your birthday I suppose.

“No wait, now I’m ONE OF THE FOUR HORSES OF THE APOCALYPSE!”

Um…

Ok, back to you then, Dale.

“Please spare me, death!  My family doesn’t want to see me go now, not in my underwear in the front yard!”

Tallahassee: “Who was he again?”

Bella: “I think he was an old hobo Pat took pity on and cared for?”

“Sigh.  Fine, I’ll go.”

“Oh, the death of someone is always sad to watch.  But I know something that will help ease the pain, baby, if you know what I mean…”

“MOM!  It’s me, ur friggin’ SON!  Wut the fuck?!”

“OH, I’m sorry Bear!  You just look so much like your father, I can’t tell in this darkness…”

“Wut are yew talkin’ bout, I look nothin’ like papa!  How can yew confuse me fur ur red headed husband?!”

Speaking of awkward flirts:

What the piss, Nascar?!  All I did was click on your stress moodlet!

“What can I say, the microwave jus’ can’t do it fur me like it used to!  Besides, I’ve been hearin’ bout how much guy trouble you’ve been havin’, Tater.”

“No, Nascar!  Ur like my uncle ‘r somethin’, ‘n that’s just too creepy.”

“Aw… I’m going to be alone forever, aren’t I…”

Poor Nascar, that looks so pitiful.

“Yeah, maybe that wus a lil harsh on the poor guy, he hasn’t had any luck since his one failing flirt wid’ some chick in Twinbrook…”

“Hey baby, wut’s ur sign?”

No Tater.  I know Nascar is lonely but we aren’t breeding with the robot.  He’ll find something.

Aw, LOOK!  Zac smiling!  Isn’t that the cutest thing…

“GET THAT CAM’RA OUTTA MY FACE”

I knew that wouldn’t last long.

So finally Tater finds the guy I set down in a random field out in the middle of nowhere (like he’s going to live there long anyway 😉 ).

Ken Woodard: “Oh your eyes are so beautiful, I could just loose myself forever in them!”

“Whoa dude, I haven’t even taken yew home yet!”

“Oh that can be arranged baby…”

*stabs*

While Tater spends his time looking for his pepper spray, the camera drags me back to the house for something:

“Ooh, it’s my birthday!  Oh YAY!  Do I get cake too?!”

I’m sorry, I forgot and now it’s too late.  Then again, the horses don’t need to stand around and complain about it all hours of the day after your caking anyway.

“I’m older, less flirty, and ready to play some Oblivion!”

Um, no one is playing Oblivion anymore, Bear.  It’s all about Skyrim now.

“Oh, um… *rubs face paint off forehead*”

Doesn’t matter, he had the damn logo upside down anyway XD

Anyway I haven’t gotten around to showing off what he looks like unghosty.  This is normal Bear.

I know, I stared way too long too.

“Ladies please, no flash photography.”

Is it sad that I took at least five photos like this? ._.

Tallahassee on the other hand is still a loser.

“Carrots are good for your eyes, baby.”

Not in your case they aren’t.

In other news, Bella now does her little “sexy time” animation only an ungodly amount of times since her move to the new house, especially if I don’t make her do anything to take her mind off of it.

“Oh Pat dear, I think it’s time for a little “rub down” if you know what I’m saying ;)”

“Oh WOW, my wife is coming on to ME, for once!  Oh yeah baby, git in that bedroom!”

Nascar: * invisible headdesk*

I finally went back to see how Tater and Ken were getting along, only to find…

More awkward time, JEEZ guys, I was only gone one hour!

“I can’t really… I think ur zipper’s a lil stuck…”

“Ooh yeah, that’s ok, just take your time…”

“I think that was worth at least a couple of quarters, don’t you think? :D”

*more headdesk*

“Yew’d think yew’d at least jus’ take me to see a movie ‘r somethin…”

“Nah, movies cost too much money.  This is fine right here, just like this.”

“Wow, yew must be a cheap ass…”

And so ends their first date.

“Yay!  Mah last child’s gettin’ to graduate today, I’m the happiest papa in the world!  Bear?  Why ain’t yew in ur gradi’ation outfit?”

“Wut?  Oh, I’m nawt graduatin’, I flunked.”

“>:(”

Oh dear.  There are more people here this go around.  And with the old people facing in the wrong direction and being completely in the way, we won’t get this done any time soon, will we?

“Good cuz I ain’t graduatin’.”

Tal: “Aw, Bear…”

Apparently neither occult sim in the Secksie family wanted a damn thing to do with the Graduation.  That’s ok, it was just Tallahassee anyway.

Tal: “This family hates me :(”

“Mama, papa, this is Ken, mah new lover!  I’ve invited him ovur to have dinner wid’ us so he could meet the fam’ly!”

“Oh, so yew did git a girlfrien’ after all, son!”

“Um, no dad, he’s just naturally this pretty ._.”

“So Kendra-”

“Ken.”

“-where’d yew say yew were from?”

“Well, I’m from Hidden Springs, but right now I live in a field without so much as a toilet or a fridge.  But I love your house, it’s pretty cozy and nice for a dumpy trailer!  Better than a empty space with a rabid raccoon fighting you over for trash scraps.”

“Aw, did you hear that Pat?  He thinks your dumpy little trailer is cute.  At least someone appreciates your choice in housing, dear.”

“I didn’t choose this hawse as furst choice ‘n yew know this Bella.”

“Yes well, you should also know I’m more high class than this and you still chose something with a tarp on the roof.  Congrates Pat, you win home keeper of the year.”

“Papa, mama didn’t mean it too be that mean, I’m sure, please stop tryin’ to choke urself on that hotdog.”

“Shufup I’ll do wua’ I wua-”

*COUGH COUGH HACK PHLEGM*

“See papa, now don’t yew feel silly?”

“Your father can’t even down a hot dog right!  THIS is how you should do it! *slaps chin with it and moans*”

“Oh God Tater, make your mother stop that!  What’s wrong with her?!”

“PAPA, make mama stop embarassin’ me in front of Ken!  She’s bein’ perverted with her food again!”

“BELLA, nawt at the dinner table… meet me in the bedroom in three minutes!  I need to have a “talk” wid’ yew…”

*Washes dishes first*

“Psst, that means we’re gonna go do sex things :D”

“…I can kind of tell from Tater’s muffled sobs…”

“Tee hee… would you like to join us, Ken?”

“UM, I think that getting in a bed with YOU is a REALLY BAD idea…”

“Aw come on cute lil’ alien guy… I do the best handjobs in the world…”

“TATER, I’m leaving now, this is too awkward for me!”

(I’m not kidding, Bella stood over Ken and did her gesture four times in a row.  God, she’s desperate…)

*door slam*

“Um, did we come back at a bad time or something?”

“Hey Ken, I’m sorry ’bout mama’s reaction back in there… she kinda has a thing for alien properganduh’, ‘n shit…”

“Well I’m not an alien, and I didn’t like being called as such.”

“Well if it makes yew feel better, we ain’t racist ‘r anythin’.  She’s just stupid.”

“Humph.”

“Hey!  I think I know wut’ll make yew feel better ;)”

“*GASP* Pizza coupons!”

“Um… just meet me in the back in two seconds…”

EIGHT ATTEMPTS TO GET HIM TO FOLLOW TATER TO THE BACK, HOWEVER:

“La dee da, I have no idea where Tater is at or what I’m supposed to do now *does WHATEVER he fucking wants*”

Tater in a distance: “Dammit Ken, I’ve been waiting naked in the hay for 30 minutes, git ur scrawny ass out here before the burrs git too far in mah butt!”

And so they never got around to doing it yet.

“Sooo, wut’cha playin’, Bear?”

“Skyrim!  It’s so AWESOME, Cletus!”

“… I don’t know, the graphics aren’t as gud as they were hyped up to be…”

“Naw, it’s just this damn ole’ ass tv… damn non-HD cheap ass crap…”

AW, look’it him!  He’s practicing to be white trash 😀

“BOO!  Turns out I don’t like you at all, Kenisha!”

“Ken, sir.”

“I like that Luthur’ boy better than you!  He used to bring me chewin’ tur’baccer to win mah favor, you don’t bring me a damn thing!”

“Well I think you are just plain old trash, sir! >:O”

“Oh dear, I don’t like the sound of that out there…”

“Papa, Ken, stop fightin’ out heer, ain’t no call fur this now!  Look Ken, papa doesn’t mean ill towards ya, he’s jus’ a lil picky ’round new people in his hawse, that’s all really.”

“Haha, he’s green.”

“CAN I JUST GO BACK TO MY HOUSE NOW?”

“Dear, yew lived in a field, yew don’t have a hawse to go back to.”

*quick wardrobe change*

“But YEW are my house, Tater!”

“OH KEN!  Ain’t yew jus’ the sweetest thang!”

Horse Bella: “LOL I have no idea how I got up on the porch!  I are a horse!”

“HOLY SHIT HEARTS *rams head through porch top*”

“Yew enjoyin’ our date so far, hon?”

“Well, considering it took us five hours to figure out how to get off the porch with the horse stuck through the roof, I guess it’s ok so far.”

“Well I’m about to make it better for ya…”

(DAMN PHOTOBOMBING CAT)

“Ken Wood’urd?  Will yew marry me?!”

“Oh… YES!  Yes I will, Tater!”

“Aw, this is so pretty, Tater!  I can’t believe you actually got me a ring!”

“And I can’t believe you said yes after my mama came on to ya ‘n my dad carried on the way he did!”

“Bah, your parents aren’t so bad, I can live with them if it means I get to live with you! Oh Tater, this is the best night ever!”

“Tater?   Where’d you go?”

“Tater?  Wut yew doin’ back so early, I thought yew were on a date wid ur boyfrien’!  Did it go wrong or something?”

“It was goin’ fine!  I don’t know wut happened or how I ended up back here!”

Nascar: * invisible headdesk*

 

About missmiserie

I'm HUNGRY.
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25 Responses to Why Bella is an Embarrassment

  1. B says:

    Gotta love Bella’s inappropriate-ness 😛

  2. Skehrer says:

    Oh dear, I thinly Bella could be suffering from withdrawals. I hope she doesn’t trick Ken into sleeping with her. We know how crafty that one can be! Bear… Bear… BEAR!!! Wow, who would have thought.
    I’m going to miss Dale 😦
    You’re so close to finishing your legacy!!!!

  3. Elocine says:

    I must say that I’m a little sad that the hottest Secksie in the house right now is a ghost. lol! Also, I really like Ken. Sucks that Tater bamphed back to the house like that!

  4. uggles says:

    What in the WORLD is that animation Bella does all the time? I have never seen it except from her in your legacy, rofl!

    Ken and Tater! Eee! I cracked up at the picture of them hugging because it really looks like Ken has a big gap between his front teeth, Alfred E. Newman style. Poor kid, he’s going to be stuck under the same roof with Bella. That can’t end well XD.

    • missmiserie says:

      I’ve only seen it here too, and it wasn’t just Bella, Deborah did it a couple times too. I think it’s from the born saleswoman trait.

      Oh great, now that gap is all I’m going to see XD

  5. Rochelle says:

    Omg, Bear made me DROOOOOOL. Best-looking ghost ever.

    Dale, whyyyyyy ;_; I’ll miss him. He WAS a bit of a jerkass but then he got all awesome and THEN HE DIED! He probably lived longer than he should’ve though, because Deborah died looooong ago.

    OMG, BELLA. GO SIT IN A BOX AND NEVER COME OUT. xDD

    …AMG I HAD BABIES WITH THAT. ARGH, SIMSELF!

    I’ve only ever had that animation with one of my tester sims, but after that I never saw it again. I will have to put Bella through gruesome tests! Maybe it’s something to do with a trait.

    Ken and Tater! ❤ poor Ken, getting so violated by Bella and then glitched off by Tater. I love his eyes!

    • missmiserie says:

      He lived WAY too damn long. I was just counting seconds at that point.

      I KNOW, JESUS. YOUR SIMSELF HAS WEIRD TASTE XD

      I think it’s born saleswoman trait. That’s what I stand by.

  6. Malin says:

    Whoah! Bear is looking fiiine~

    And Ken is adorable… and very mousy-lookin’ with those ears of his. :3

    Bella. Oh Bella… What to do with her? I hope you have something brilliant planned for her!

    • missmiserie says:

      I wasn’t thinking mousey, I was thinking more like sexy orc… is that even possible?!

      I don’t really have anything brilliant, I would just like her out of my way forever >_>

  7. Tree says:

    If Bear had more normal lips I’d say he was perfect but he ended up inheriting Bella’s weird lemon-sucking (or other item-sucking wat >.>) lips. He’s still pretty fine though, I’ll concede to that.

    • missmiserie says:

      I know, WTF is that shit?! I’m thinking about uploading a fixed lip version of him on the exchange, or maybe a fixed one and the untouched one for the original’s sake. Still debating.

  8. Monkey Buns says:

    You seem to have a lot of bugs… Recently I have a baby that when I put him into his crib every action for him I queue up disappears. I keep having to reset him but the adult sims put him back into the crib. Would you happen to have any advise? I have downloaded twallan’s mod for story progression and recently I added awesome mod was hoping it would fix it but it doesn’t. I don’t know what is causing the problem.

    • missmiserie says:

      Try moving the family out and moving them back in. That fixes a lot of my problems, and if not, force the baby to age up if you can. Or delete the crib, if that’s where the problem is coming from.

  9. StyxLady says:

    Bella cracks me up so hard! She’s really going off the deep end. I think it must be the sight of a green-skinned man that did it to her. xD

    Poor Ken. Finally gets engaged and then his fiance disappears from in front of him! Oy, game. Oy.

  10. omg I saw Bear on True Blood.

  11. Madcapp says:

    ““I’m older, less flirty, and ready to play some Oblivion!””
    … this rocks so hard. and WOW! Bear is one sexy sim! In fact.. which store hair does he have, do you know? It looks really nice! I haven’t had much luck with the store hair. I do believe he’s coming to my game to marry my girl Beatrix. 😀

    Tater and Ken… O,o He gets it from his mom.

  12. Kayla says:

    Since Bella has the born saleswoman trait,that hand thing she does is her posing trying to sell something.

  13. Alli B says:

    Poor Ken; In the pic where he’s talking about his living conditions, you can see how hungry/happy he looks at being able to eat actual food.

  14. somebodysangel13 says:

    Daaaamn, Bear is hawt! Too bad we can’t see that hotness all the time *hint hitn*

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