And I’d like to take a minute, just sit right there, I’ll tell you how I became the prince of a town called-”
Edamame: “OMG YOU RUINED HIS RAP, SHUT UP”
Dallas: “Hmm, the textures are finally back.”
Edamame: “Yep, that’s what 40 years of smoking will do to you.”
In other news, I was overly thrilled with the Secksie’s neighbors anonymously telling ghost stories.
But back at the house, I only updated the other day, but I really can’t recall what happened. Something something, Pilot came over and wouldn’t go home.
You know what, I don’t what to know.
Ronda: “Yeah, and after this yew ain’t ever gonna show me again D:<”
That’s not true… Ronda will show up… sometimes…
I didn’t know, at first I thought he was a weirdo Alvi spawn.
I didn’t think the imaginary friends would show up as people until you gave them the potion or something.
Nice to know that DD’s imaginary friend looks something like Darrell ._.
“Wut? Oh yeah, that, I felt like it wus time I needed to git’round to doin’ that, especially since I gotta work wid’ the robot, ‘n it kep’ wantin’ to git stuck in his gears ‘n stuff.”
Genny: “Robot?! WHERE?!”
Pauline: “Robot? Ooh… where?”
Pat: “They really gonna do that in our livin’ room at my burthday?”
DD: “Yeah. Disgraceful.”
Except, if you look really close at his face…
It looks like some extreme throwback from Leroy, but he I’m guessing that he got his mother’s small bridge and Dale’s nostrils.
Because he’s a growing boy, and DD was sleeping in the same bed as her mother for I don’t know how long, I thought it would be better for Pat and Deborah to swap rooms and Pat and DD could share. There is more space here than the old room anyway, so there you go.
Oh, go have your mood swing somewhere else.
Pat and DD still got a better deal than Ronda. She’s still living in the trailer with her father, and instead of upgrading it like a good sim player I’m supposed to be, Ronda sleeps pretty much anywhere she wants. Poor Nascar.
“And this’s wut gud chess form luks like, ‘n always remember that the queen goes on her own color.”
Not what I think a good bedtime story would be like. But it can’t be any worse than Deborah teaching Pat about the mechanics of a shower head, and it’s better than the smut you would think Dale WOULD read to Ronda.
“Wen’s her mama supposed to do somethin’ wid her again?!”
“Wut the CRAP’s that supposed to be?! I don’t like him!”
Oh Nascar, don’t get jealous.
“Ur REPLACIN’ me wid’ him, AIN’T YA?!”
YOU CAN’T EVEN SEE HIM, WHY ARE YOU COMPLAINING
“Oh… THE ROBOT CAN SEE ME! ABORT MISSION, ABORT MISSION”
But the more I thought about it, and the more she whored herself around in my Sinbad/Lucy game, the more I realized that I needed her in this household. So I yanked her out of that game and plopped her here. Originally, the Bachelors were placed in their original house, but two days later, I find that they moved to the Landgraabs old place. Because they are SOOO SPECIAL like that. Uppity Bachelors. NEED TO BRING THEM DOWN A PEG
I tried to give Bella a nice girl outfit, so she won’t come off so slutty with the Secksies.
“New guy? Handjob??”
Simis, you just going to stand there and let your daughter do this?! I thought you said you raised her better than this!
“But… the mailbox! Why is my fancy mailbox all grey and ugly?!”
OH GOD PAT STEP AWAY FROM HER
“Oh… thank gawd… Well anyway, my name’s Pat, ‘n I was wondrin’ if yew wanna go to prom wid’ me cuz yew is so purdy-”
“Aw, how sweet. However, I don’t know you, and you just aren’t my type, so I’m going to have to say no.”
“OMG THEY ARE SO PRETTY! Yes, I would LOVE TO GO to prom with you!”
Ok Bella, you got to stop turning to the aliens to get you out of stuff. They aren’t going to be getting you out of your problems forever >:\
“… I DO?!”
Oh wow, I completely forgot about that. Deborah got it when she first moved in out of remembrance for her Pipaw. I can’t believe I over looked that.
Oh man, I’m sorry Ronda, I bet you were adorable.
“Yeah right, yew BET. Screw yew, I’m goin’ to bed now. Bitch.”
Stuffed animals: *fear in silence*
“I’m ignorin’ yew cus I can’t SEE YEW IN THE FIRST PLACE”
I can’t leave you alone for ten minutes, can I Nascar?
Dale, who I’ve kinda over looked since the girls were born, one day out of the blue wished to become a firefighter. Being the only noble wish I have ever seen him roll, I let him get that job, pretty much because I haven’t had a firefighter yet, and he might get out of this bum state he is in.
“Thanks, DD. I also can’t imagine a greater friend than ye-”
Nascar: *bust opens the door* “I KNOW HE’S IN HEER, GIT AWAY FRUM HIM DD, HE’S EVIL”
Oh hell, Nascar done gone start some shit NOW
I DON’T CARE LALALA
Anyway, Ronda and Daisy successfully completed the fusion dance, and became one ultimate being, Rondy, complete with a BADASS hairstyle that really should be in the game.
On the other side of town, Dale starts his first day at work, finally. There he started rolling all kinds of naughty wants with Bebe who was all but impressed when she finally got fed up with him and sent him to stop his first fire.
“Aw man, I can’t believe I had to stop talkin’ to the hot chick for this shit…”
“Did yew say kitchen? Oh man, I’m so hungry!”
Needless to day, Audio lost everything in his kitchen ._.
Back to the graveyard. This isn’t really a picture taken to show that the girls are sleeping here, but if you look closely, you can see the statue of the grim reaper being haunted. Makes you wonder who is still up at 3 in the AFTERNOON.
Well then that would mean you are the worst superhero I’ve ever seen. But seeing as there are small water droplets dripping behind you, I can guess at who was really moving the statue…
Yeah, come on, I can’t be the only one thinking that there was some fowl play between Opal and the Clown. Why else would a little girl with face paint be buried next to a clinically depressed clown of the same cause of death? That’s just morbid, EA.
ABOUT FUCKING TIME
“Why is my white ghost so black?”
I don’t know, why is the shower still so grey
FUCK MY TEXTURES, SERIOUSLY.
I know, why couldn’t Darrell think about someone besides himself for once, amirite?! GOSH.
“Well, I’m hungry fur one-”
“GET IN THE URN”
RIP Darrell Secksie. He didn’t complete his LTW, pretty much because he didn’t even have the drive in him to even go to work, and he leaves behind kids, a wife, and his beloved Stonewall Jackson.
And I still can’t believe I made you that tux. Seriously, it was tacky on my class’s valedictorian, and it’s even tackier now.
Too bad this happened before Bella even got to prom, as you can see, there she is in the background, thinking of trash, not even wearing the prom dress I gave her to wear D:<
So this opens the question up: Who the hell was Pat dancing with?!
I’M ENDING THIS CHAPTER NOW.
So next time, what will Pat/Bella be like? Will Bun Onion and Nascar resolve their problem with each other? Will there be an heir poll despite all my love for Pat? Will I stop with these chapter ending questions?!
“That’s because my life was a miserable short woe, my heart is broken and I’m too preoccupied with my saddness to get wrapped up in your game of TAG”
“Oh shuddup an’ run already.”